Quiet Time

I just shared this with a dear, dear, dear friend and thought I should put it here too.  Many homeschool moms (including myself) have come to the necessity of a quiet time during the day when they can gather their mental faculties and recharge a little, work on lessons, book field trips, catch up on church responsibilities, etc.  Naptime works till little ones no longer need (or just desire) a midday snooze. 

In our case, we have one 2-hour napper, one midday groucher, and one becoming-more-mature-but-sometimes-grouchy-at-naptime boy.  So I laid down the law about a year or more ago and instituted Quiet Time.  It's during naptime and happens almost every day of the week.  It's about an hour long (longer and the boys start falling asleep or start straying from their spots too much). 

The boys both have their Quiet Time spots; Trevor in his bed, and Conrad on the couch.  They don't have to sleep (unless they're really grouchy), but they need to choose quiet independent activities, like reading or knitting that won't bug anyone else or require a lot of help.  I recently came upon a discovery that has revolutionized our Quiet Time.

Busy Bags!! 

I made a ton of busy bags for our Idaho trip this summer and the boys found them hidden away about a month ago and asked to use them.  It was right before Quiet Time, so I thought it would be a great quiet activity for them to use once and then I'd find a better hiding spot for the bags so I could save them for future trips. 

The bags work great!  They won't be hiding anytime soon. I'm really loving this concept and its versatility.  Lots of moms use these for restaurants while waiting for food or in the waiting room at the dentist's/doctor's office.  My favorite site that I found while scouring the many sites out there was this one: 

http://testyyettrying.blogspot.com/2011/12/car-ride-activities-set-1.html

It's a speech pathologist mom who has 7-8 posts on busy bags, each with several cheap, easy, quick ideas for busy bags.  And out boys love almost all of them.  Or you could do a google search for "busy bags".  Good luck with your quiet time!

September-October 2013

We've been moving a little slower this year than last year.  The boys have been content to be at home or our cozy library or with familiar friends rather than the aquarium or elsewhere.  Here are a few highlights from the last two months:

1. We were ending our vacation at the beginning of September, so school started late for us. I LOVE the flexibility of homeschool!  We can go places when it's not so crowded and get cheaper accomodations.  I'm still working on posting photos on our family blog, so check there.

2.  Visted a pizza farm with friends and took a wagon ride.

3. Orchard with Sean.  We are so blessed to have San home for a three-day weekend every week.  I am often able to schedule our field trips so it can be a full-family experience.  This year we showed Sean our favorite orchard and had a ton of fun even though it rained on and off.

4. Playdates with homeschool friends.  We have some pretty awesome friends!

5. Clean the church (I count this as a service learning experience, so it counts--service is high on our list for education). :)

6.  Boat tour/ride.  Some friends of ours treated us to a ride on an antique ferry.  It was sunk at the bottom of the lake years ago and was pulled out and refurbished and is now a floating museum.  It rained on us then, too, but it was still awesome.  We sat right by the engine and Sean got to explain mechanics to the boys. 

7.  Trevor started his art class.  We decided that with funds low, we'd take advantage of the generous offer for homeschoolers in Minnesota.  Homeschoolers Trevor's age are allowed to take two classes through the public schools as long as there is room and resources for them.  It's been a good experience, and Trevor has come to look forward to his art class and what he gets to learn. 

8. India Culture Day with our homeschool group.  I could have sat there and eaten the delicious dishes all day long.  These moms can cook!  Each family brought a dish or two to share at a picnic and planned an activity or something educational to share later at the library.  It was fabulous!  One family made a video while we were there and it turned out so cute!  We're doing this every month now and we can't wait for Dia de los Muertos tomorrow! 

9.  Nature center with homeschool group.  We played in the somewhat dry creekbed and the kids found a tiny snake that they passed around. 

10.  General Conference trip- this year we again went to New Ulm for their German festival.  We ate sauerkraut, danced polka to the live band, and watched the glockenspiel. 

11. The second annual vegetable stand for Trevor.  Conrad joined him this year and we did a better job advertising, so the boys both got enough money for fun homeschools activities and kits this year.  They were SO cute together!

Other experiences: going to the beach, playdates with church friends, doctor visit, dentist visit, lots of visits to the nature center.

Gameplan 2013

We just got back from a long trip to Idaho last week, so our school week starts tomorrow!  Even with a later start than most schools, I still feel like it snuck up on me.  I am SO glad I prepared everything before we left on vacation, so all I had to do today was review my plans and get pumped up!  That's right, I am so excited to start!  I have new goals, a more experienced outlook, and well, it's past midnight, so I'm feeling the rush of what I call "stolen me time" (you know, when you stay up so late getting that golden "me" time, which just ends up being time stolen from your kids/family because you're too tired to be of any use to them later...but it's not my fault! I tried the sleeping thing already!)

Back to the main point...

I have what I believe is a great plan for our family.  Here's our VERY basic plan for this year (below).  It also includes field trips/classes (of course). Also not listed is some very cool plans for a timeline, so we can add events as we learn about them across the subjects.  We'll be doing the same with our world map.  I was inspired at our most recent homeschool conference to draw up a "learning tree" that will show all of our interests and how they're connected, so hopefully we'll have pictures of that to share someday. 

And of course chores are still huge on my list.  We just started a new laundry system that is working really well.  Trevor has been doing his own laundry all summer long now.  Can you imagine how amazed I was when he (without reminders) took his own laundry basket to the basement and started his load, finished it, and folded and put his clothes away!  It really didn't take that much work to teach him, either.  Just a really good system and a very awesome boy.

I found a karate class for Trevor that we can afford, but guess what?  After all this time trying to find one for him and the joy of finally discovering it, he is not interested!  The ingratitude.  :)  He says he wants to try art classes instead.  So we're going to see what we can do.  Other than that and the spring play, I don't think we'll be trying to do anything longer term than 2-3 months' worth of commitment.

For scripture study, we're using this site: http://www.bookofmormonstudyguide.com/  
It was recommended by a dear friend for preparing a child for baptism.  Trevor will be 8 in 1 1/2 years! 

	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday	Sunday
Scriptures	BoM study Guide/ scripture picture	same	same	same	same	same	same
Reading	Conrad's reading lesson/Trevor free reading	Conrad/Trevor FIAR	Conrad's reading lesson/Trevor free reading	Conrad/Trevor FIAR	Conrad's reading lesson/Trevor free reading OR FIAR
Music	Music time w/ instruments, learn one composer per month from books	Music time w/ instruments, Trevor guitar	Music time w/ instruments, learn one composer per month from books	Music time w/ instruments, Trevor guitar	Music time w/ instruments
Art/Science	Art: various projects	Science: Lesson from books	Art: various projects	Science: project	Interest Lessons (below)
History/ Phonics/ Handwriting	History: Read one section from Story of The World, write one sentence in journal/ draw pic	Phonics/ Handwriting: T-Explode the Code/ Handwriting w/o Tears C-Alphabet/ word games	History: Read one section from Story of The World, write one sentence in journal/ draw pic	Phonics/ Handwriting: T-Explode the Code/ Handwriting w/o Tears C-Alphabet/ word games	T's Interests: Astronomy Currents Guitar Human Body
Math		Math: Miquon worksheet and/or game		Math: Miquon worksheet and/or game	C's Interests: Hands-on

And my personal theme for this year is (drumroll please)....

INSPIRE!

It refers to the type of motivation I'm going for.  I want my kids to be motivated to learn and explore on their own with my guidance, not by force or requirement.  Oh, there are things I will require of them, but I want to rein in that awful tendency to push them to complete tasks just so we can check something off a list.  I want them to see Sean and I doing good things and be inspired or just interested in doing them too. 

My Way

During the past year, I've been truly inspired by some amazing women, mostly from our homeschool group.  I want to preface that way because I'm going to confess that I need to part ways with some of their, um, ways.  See, they're just SO amazing--completely on a different level from myself--that though I would love to do what they do and allow my ideals and fanciful visions float me away into educational and family bliss, I'm just not there yet. 

There's a lot of talk about unschooling (or similar philosophies) and throwing caution to the wind and just going where your interests/your children's interests take you.  I think it actually takes a very responsible individual to be able to do that.  A person who is successful at that type of philosophy, in my opinion, is a person who has already learned good habits and doesn't need to focus on lower-level learning, like I do.  I'm more the type of mom who can't decide whether I want to wake up before my kids or not, so letting my kids follow interests based on my example sometimes is probably not a good idea.  My interests inevitably lead to a comfy couch and a book--not really the well-rounded approach.

 I realized that many of these moms who have a looser bent toward homeschooling have admitted to being quite the opposite in the beginning.  It makes me wonder if it's something necessary almost, like a step in progression.  As for myself, I have decided that I absolutely must do things my way this Fall.  It might look more scheduled and more like "school at home" than I prefer, but I need to build my foundation stronger before I will feel confident in a less stringent, more creative, more free atmosphere.  It's definitely what's best for my kids right now.  Trevor is especially a structure-loving boy, and I can almost feel the sigh of comfort coming from his soul when he feels the familiarity of "what comes next".  I think Abigail will be the same way...now what to do with our monkey in the middle...For now he's just content as long as he gets Mommy Conrad Time.  Today we made an art project together with shapes, glue, and stickers, and I couldn't be happier to see him having fun with it.

I'm drawing up some plans right now that include some goals for our 2013/2014 school year.  I'll include them when I'm finished, maybe in a few weeks.  It's going to be MY way; what's best for our family and everyone in it.

Cold Feet

Yikes! I think I'm getting cold feet.  One more month till Trevor starts "1st grade".  We never really stop homeschooling, so not much has changed this summer (besides the weather), but all my inadequacies and concerns are flooding back just as they did last year when my cold feet got so bad that I enrolled him in a charter school.  This decision is so hard! 

As I look at the reasons I'm so anxious about this fall, it's all about me!  My own fears over my personal weaknesses. 

Part of me is in "nesting" mode; getting ready for the school year by stocking supplies, researching curricula, organizing and reformatting our learning areas and storage.  The other part of me is screaming, "What are you thinking!" 

Have a little confidence, girl!  It's ridiculous that I should be so down on myself when my focus should be on my children and what's best for them.  When I get down on myself, it uninspires me (I think I made that word up...pretty sure you can't use that as a verb).  Really, though, what happens is the opposite of inspiration.  I become demotivated to keep going because I doubt my abilities and give up again and again.  I've got to stop that!  I've learned so much over the last year and I'm bound to continue learning, reshaping habits, reevaluating and overhauling. 

I often turn to homeschool blogs when I need a little encouragement.  One blog I read recently said that when you feel like I do right now, it's important to remember to take it one day at a time, and focus on just loving your child for that day.  Everything else falls into place when you're putting love of your child first.  I just need to be strong and do what I know is right, follow the promptings that come despite any self-doubt I may have. 

Not-End-of-Year Party

While schools were having their End-of-Year parties, our awesome homeschool group had a "Not-End-of-Year" Party.  Because homeschool goes on and on, and in a lot of families, there isn't a huge difference between summer and the rest of the year.

 

February through May Experiential Learning

February:
1. Sean took the kids to the Flour Mill Museum, took the train there
2. Sang at the nursing home twice
3. Conrad's music class at the library
4. Trevor's Polymer Chemistry at The Works Museum, made slime
5. Toured the Ice Castles with whole family
6. Trevor's Nature Center homeschool class
7. MOA amusement park with whole family
8. Trevor's Base Camp through BSA (archery, rock climbing, group games)
9. Homeschool play groups, book discussion
Also library visits, play practice, dance lessons each month

March:
1. Breakfast on the Lake with whole family
2. Nursing home visit and visited the Jones' to teach yogurt while kids played
3. Children's Theatre backstage tour
4. Trevor's nature center class, geology
5. Baptism (Mark)
6. Eileen Ivers Fiddle concert
7. Trevor's 6th birthday party
8. MN Mormon Chorale Easter concert
9. Whole family went to 3D movie

April:
1. 2 Baptisms (one was Markus)
2. Youth music night concert
3. Mille Lacs Indian Museum
4. Bowling as a whole family
5. Went to James Sewell ballet w/ whole family- Carnival of the Animals
6. Cleaned church
7. Trevor's nature center class- layers of the earth
8. Homeschool friends over to our house for set building
9. The Works Museum homeschool class- kaleidoscopes

May:
1. Pilobolus performance with the whole family
2. MN history museum
3. Painted sets for the play at friends' house
4. Children's Theatre live showing of the play Alice in Wonderland (whole family)
5. Trevor's homeschool nature center class
6. Trevor performed in the homeschool play, "Felicia and the Pot of Pinks"
7. Father and Sons Campout/ Girls Night with Laura and Abigail
8. Dance dress rehearsal and dance recital

There are always things I don't include because it feels weird putting things on the list like doctor's appointments or dinner guests or helping families move, but what we're going for is a wide range of experiences, not just field trips or passive audience events, so in my mind, those things really are on the list.  Throughout these months, we also had dance lessons, play practices, library visits, playgroups/playdates, and nature walks.  I learned a lot about trying to give my kids in-the-real-world experiences this year, and I'm excited to share, but I hear Abigail waking from her nap, so that will have to wait.  :)

Carrots

I am studying (I did say that deliberately rather than just "reading"--I need something more than a casual read in order to improve!) another parenting book that is opening my mind a lot.  I'll have to post more on it another time, but for now, I want to share this quote that I really do agree with and relates to education:

"One researcher, after spending more than fifteen years following the careers of high school valedictorians, concluded that most of them simply 'know how to do school. They are not the group to look for, for creative breakthroughs...or for becoming notable leaders in a particular area."

I'm definitely not saying they are all like this.  But the point the book is trying to make is that sadly, many of these students are just the ones who have fallen into the trap of "doing school" for the carrots, the rewards, and once they end up in the real world where the carrots are more intrinsic in nature, they fail.

Book Review

Homeschooling in America: Capturing and Assessing the Movement

I really enjoy reading research as long as it comes from a credible, uncorrupt, objective source.  I just like truth.  So this book was enjoyable for me for that reason.  There are tons of books that will slant either way, toward public school or (more likely) toward home education.  This one is basically just a comprehensive review of research, and answered some questions I've been curious about for some time. 

The first 2/3rds of the book was old news for me, having already read a lot of research online and in other books, but the last three chapters were definitely worth my time.  A few statistics I was interested to learn:

The average number of library visits per month for homeschool families is 3.8.

36.4% of homeschool families watch no television at home.  Wow!  I knew it would be high, but never would have guessed that high!

I've already mentioned this in previous posts, but homeschool kids overwhelmingly score higher academically than public schooled kids.  While I try not to focus on grades and scores, this is still a telling fact.  Sean and I both come from lower-income families and parents who were able to gain little or no college education, so even more interesting on a personal level is the fact that children from both low-income families and families with parents with lower levels of education do much better than children from similar families whose children go to public schools.  I also found it interesting that the race, income, parental education, and gender differences that sadly have a profoundly negative impact on achievement in public schools are muted or almost nonexistent with homeschooled children from the same backgrounds. 

More Insight on Chores

As you may know, we've been working on the basics this year for our family goals.  Those basics include teaching the gospel (i.e. scripture reading), family responsibilities, hygiene, and any other practical life skills that we consider essential. 

I've been trying to figure out a bit of a mystery in our house.  Trevor is really obedient when I ask him (and him alone) to do a chore, but if I ask both boys, Trevor will balk and drag his feet.  When I ask Conrad (whether alone or not) he complains and doesn't want to do what I've asked, which is why Trevor does the same thing when I ask them both at the same time to help.  Trevor sees Conrad acting that way and thinks that chores must be pretty awful and that he can get out of it if he does what Conrad does.

I thought back to what we did with Trevor, because Trevor really does obey when I only ask him.  I realized that we did several things different for him:

1. We didn't require him to do any chores start to finish on his own until he was about 5. 

2. We made chores into play for him and he was allowed to help with a few things and stop whenever he wanted.  It was never compulsory at that age.

3. We always did chores with Trevor before he was 5.  I really believe it's important for kids not to be commanded all the time.  They need to be shown and guided, not ordered around, especially when they're really young.  I don't like it when I hear moms say, "I don't know why they won't obey me!" Maybe it's the stubborn, willful, (and maybe sometimes disobedient) part of my personality, but why in the world should parents set themselves up as a dictatorial authority?  Most of the time, I do believe it's okay for my kids to question me, and I will answer their questions kindly (while still being firm if it's something I know I shouldn't move on). There's nothing wrong with a little dialogue about why they should be obedient to this or that rule.

So that brings me to my own problem: I don't know why they won't obey me!  Okay, so the previous thinking exercise helped me to see why Conrad is having a hard time obeying when it comes to chores.  He's too young!  He's just too young to be required to do chores.  Really, I already knew this, but I look at the boys play together and they seem so...equal.  Physically, they can do so many of the same things.  Conrad is witty and wily.  And so I've felt unfair when I've required something of Trevor that Conrad doesn't also have to do.  Conrad is only 3 and Trevor is 6!  Of course I shouldn't expect the same things from them yet.  Sheesh, mom, get a clue!

So I've been trying to not feel guilty when I require Trevor to do something and not Conrad.  I'm also trying to make work fun for Conrad and not be too strict with making him finish a job he starts.  He still needs a lot of help with things over his abilities.  I feel more relaxed already! 

Hold Everything!

Ugh.  Every now and then I come to a point when I realize that my parenting needs some work.  I try to work on it constantly, but there are times when it seems I've been neglecting something for months and haven't realized it needs to be worked at, or have just not given it the proper attention.  Poor Conrad.  He has suffered the pains of my parental weaknesses the most for a long time now.  It must be so difficult to be the middle child, especially when you're three!  Everything is going great with homeschooling, but with my relationship with Conrad, I feel that he's being dragged behind a horse and the horse just keeps going.  I need to stop everything and take a good look at his needs and what I can do to help him grow and feel loved.

Homeschooling is just parenting 24/7 really, and I feel the need to brush up on my parenting skills very often.  So for now, I'm putting aside my book list (again), to review The Power of Positive Parenting and look into a few new sources (friends have suggested Alfie Kohn books).  And trying to read scriptures and pray more regularly in order to keep the conduit of the Spirit open for revelation and reinforcement for my efforts.  So Sparks of Genius will have to wait.  And my list of improv books and Unschooling Rules.  I'm still getting used to my new calling at church (primary chorister!) and we have the play performance (for which I need to make a costume for and help with sets/props) and the boys' dance recital coming up in about a month, not to mention various field trips. 

It's all good stuff, and I'm not overwhelmed at all right now.  I'm learning the value of staying organized and regularly reviewing my planner calendars so I'm not caught off-guard by some forgotten committment.  And not forgetting my most important commitments--my family relationships...which means dropping my own favored agenda for relearning weak parenting skills. 

Improving

So that's a lot of good news in the last post. Something that is not going so great that we need to work on is finding happiness in the basics, the things we do every day, no matter what else is going on. There have been not a few complaints about scripture time and chores and things like dressing in the morning and brushing teeth. Maybe it's the kid in me that will never really grow up and disappear, but I still don't believe duties HAVE to be un-fun, even things that have to be done. I've heard plenty of people say that "kids need to learn that some things in life that just have to be done."  Yeah, but what about Mary Poppins' "element of fun"? Don't tell my mom, but to this day I still enjoy cleaning toilets. Toilets! (Maybe that's why my boys fight over who gets to do it!) And there's something very soothing about washing dishes by hand in a sinkful of warm soapy water. And on the days when I push through a few boring verses of scripture, I am always rewarded with something inspiring before I'm finished. To me, it is more an issue of attitude than one of duty. Yes, there are things that need to be done, but how we feel about them is up to us.

You can always find something negative in a task, but you can also always find something positive, even if it's the tiniest little good thing, it's there. In fact, we make clean-up a game every time if we can, and we're always thinking up new ways to play clean-up. Sometimes the boys get tongs from the kitchen and pretend that the clutter is hot lava rocks and they have to carefully pick the items up with the tongs to put away. Other times we do Tornado Clean-up, where we clean as fast as we can, sort of crazy like a tornado. We also do Box Clean-up, where we put a box in the center of the room and throw everything in the box as fast as we can, and it's instant gratification for us because it looks clean immediately, and then we put everything away from the box. Every now and then we do a competition, where the first person to clean up 4 things gets a chocolate chip, though I don't like this one as much, the boys sure do! Another way we haven't tried yet is to tape a line accross the room and have a competition to see who can get their side clean first.  I try not to be the one who invents the games, because it's also important for the kids to learn to find their own element of fun.  One game the boys made up is using their construction toys (dump truck and the like) to clean up, or they use their stuffed animals and pretend the animals are doing the cleaning.  Edit: Trevor just made up another game after I posted this. We played I Spy Clean-up: one person spies something on the floor that needs to be put away, and when another person guesses correctly, they put it away and get to spy something next.

Of course, I prefer that we don't get to the point where we have a whole room of junk to clean up and we strive to instead clean up as we go, but big messes are inevitable and it's better not to dread clean-up.

With scriptures, I just need to continue introducing variety.  Trevor is great with doing things the same way every time, but Conrad will start to crawl all over us and be very distracting if he's bored, which has been a lot lately.  We usually take the gospel art book and Trevor's large-print scriptures and use those to do scripture time, but I think Conrad needs more interaction still.  Role-play is usually his favorite.  If he gets a choice, Samuel the Lamanite is the story he chooses because he loves acting out the scene on the wall with arrows and rocks flying.  It's so simple and doesn't need any preparation, but is very effective.  We could also use the children's version of scriptures, which we haven't utilized in a long time.  I want my kids to love reading scriptures and to develop that love early on.  So we'll keep trying new things and finding that element of fun wherever we can.

Natural Learning Connections

I love it when the kids make connections on their own.  Here are a few recent stories:

1. Today during General Conference, Trevor was making up his own rebus messages.  We had just seen rebus messages and stories in a few places like The Friend magazine and an I Spy book, so he knew what they were and was doing a really good job making his own.  It was a great time to ask him about a previous conversation on China.  I asked him if he remembered what it was called when people use pictures for words (he knew they're called pictograms) and then I asked if he remembered one group of people who used to use them before they used letters (he remembered the Chinese people did).  I LOVE those moments when connections are made and lessons reviewed without a paper quiz. 

2. A few months ago, Trevor and I were reading the Friend magazine while the little ones napped.  We read an article about President Packer and his woodcarving hobby (Feb. 2013 issue).  It had several photos of his drawings and carvings.  Trevor was really excited about it and asked if he could have a pocketknife.  He repeatedly asked for one over the next several weeks, so we got him one for his birthday. Now we've been checking out library books with simple woodcarving projects and he looks for good pieces of wood to carve every time we go for a walk.

3. Another interest of Trevor's that keeps coming up is sewing.  He has done a little bit of sewing with my mom, but he's always asking me if we can do some sewing at home.  Since my sewing machine has been buried under storage for the last several months, and we didn't ahve a good place to put it while we worked on anything, the answer has been no.  But we finally finished most of the basement and rearranged things so we can start on something soon!  (He was inspired most recently by a sock monkey in a really cool book we read called How Things Work In The House).  He was a little distracted by something else, though, so we haven't started yet.  That "something else" is...(drumroll please)...

4. His snap circuit kit!  Whoo hoo!  Finally!  We went to an electricity museum (The Bakken) last summer that just happened to be having a really awesome workshop where the kids could build their own circuits.  Trevor and Conrad both loved it and we didn't see much else of the museum that day, though we did go back later a few times (I had to see their Frankenstein exhibit--really neat!).  I asked where they got their stuff from and went to the store later to get Trevor started on his own little kit.  Well, I am no electrician and the pieces I bought were mismatched and the voltage didn't match up, and while it was still fun, it wasn't much.  We also give Trevor any electronics that break down so he can take them apart and explore them with his own tools from his toolbox we gave him for Christmas.  But I knew he needed more.  Trevor got to try out a few homeschool friends' snap circuit kits and wanted one of his own.  He got some birthday money from Sean's dad and he wanted to spend it on his much-awaited snap circuit kit.  He's been having such a blast with it and learning a ton.  I just love that boy and his curiousity.

5. In other news, I've been catching Trevor reading on his own more and more.  I love it.  Love, love, love it.  Especially when I find him reading to Conrad.  It brings tears to my eyes and is one of the most rewarding things I've witnessed so far as a mom.  My active, rambunctious boys snuggling close, quietly huddling over a book with the "eyes of learning".  I don't know how else to describe it, the look kids get in their eyes when they are deeply engaged in learning.  I could watch it all day...oh, wait, I do!!

Here's another story I shared a few weeks ago with my local homeschool group:

6. A few nights ago Abigail and I were having a rough time with sleeping, and we both slept in the next morning. I awoke hearing two little voices outside my door where we keep a small bookcase containing a set of encyclopedias. I love eavesdropping on my boys’ conversations (they’re 5 and 3), so I lay there listening. I could hear Trevor instructing, “Now we’re going to put them in order. Can you find the number 4? Good! The number 4 goes here…” I guess Trevor has heard me talk this way so many times, now he enjoys helping Conrad the same way. Conrad also enjoys the attention he gets from his big brother and is eager to learn with him. Teaching others is an awesome kind of review. I don’t think I’ve ever sat down with Conrad and tried to teach him numbers, but we count all the time and talk about numbers whenever they come up in life or in a book. Yesterday while helping me do some baking, Trevor noticed the settings on my Kitchen Aid go up by twos. So we counted by twos forward and backward for a while. We’ve been talking about skip-counting a lot lately because Trevor has been asking me about the time and we’ve been skip-counting by fives, just like the minutes on a clock. It was really satisfying to see him make the connection between that and counting by twos with the mixer settings. Maybe soon I’ll wake up to my encyclopedias in reverse order skipping every other book.

Testing, Grading, Ranking

We got the results for Trevor's homeschool test about a month ago.  You know, the one they make your kids take so the state knows you're actually doing something with your kids to teach them.  So why haven't I posted the results on our family record?  Good question.  Because Trevor did really awful?  Nope.  His composite score was above average.  So wouldn't I want everyone to know?  Even just to show friends and family that homeschooling is not so bad after all, that I'm not going to mess my kids up with this crazy, unconventional plan? 

First of all, kindergarten is not that rigorous anyway, and shouldn't be. 

Next, I feel very strongly about not ranking or grading children, especially at such a young age when their ideas of self-worth and "others-worth" are in such a green stage.  I want Trevor to feel good about his efforts, but knowing that you rank higher than someone else is not necessary to feeling good about your own efforts.  In fact, when I get a compliment for one of my kids in earshot of them, I try to talk to them about it afterward, making sure they understand that doing better at a subject or activity in no way makes them better than anyone else, that we all have different strengths and the Lord expects us to develop the talents we have, but it isn't true that we all need to be perfect at everything.  (That being said, I also feel strongly that every "subject" is interconnected and I encourage my kids to develop all areas, as well as the ones they are naturally inclined toward.)

Let me just stand a bit higher on my soapbox for a minute.  Over the years, I've learned that a lot of things effect success and achievement.  Maybe the kids Trevor ranked higher than have an abusive home life or a serious test anxiety or parents who really could care less about achievement themselves and don't set any kind of good example.  Does it make Trevor better than other people because he has a mom and a dad at home? Or because I get to be a stay-at-home mom?  Or because he has parents who care?  Maybe when we or our kids achieve something great, we shouldn't be patting ourselves on the back or endlessly praising our kids, but instead looking around to see who we can help reach their goals, too, who might not have the same advantages that we have.  Maybe it's money, maybe it's a loving mentor, maybe it's a kind word of encouragement.  (To get a little political, I think the left wouldn't be so loud about welfare if there was a little more of this attitude.) (And this is not to say I don't ever get caught up in my kids' achievements and am not prone to boasting about them from time to time--I still have a long way to go.) 

Of course there are people who have everything they could possibly need who will still make bad decisions about how to use their time and whether they develop talents.  But I believe these people are the exception rather than the rule.  I think most people, given the right circumstances and the right kind of love, can be just as successful as the next guy.

After struggling within myself about whether to put the results on the log or not, I decided to do it just for the record, and because it's a great opportunity to express my feelings about ranking and grading children.  So there you have it: according to one, unimportant test, Trevor is above average.  Whatever that means. 

Math Tidbits

Trevor just came up to me very excitedly and said, "Mommy! I just figured out that two 3's is 6 and three 2's is 6 too! Isn't that crazy!"  Awesome.  I never taught him that. 

One of his favorite things to do at dinner is to quiz Sean and I or himself.  He'll give himself the easy questions and give us the "hard" ones, trying to stump us. 

For himself, "Daddy, did you know that 4 plus 3 is 7?"

For Sean or myself, "Daddy/Mommy, what's 3...plus one hundred and two?"  It's so cute to hear him say, "Wow! How did you do that so fast?" 

We recently read a library book about Fibonacci and Trevor loved it.  I had never learned about the Fibonacci sequence, so it was fun for me, too.  It was really fascinating to learn that everyone thought Fibonacci was a blockhead because of his love of numbers, and he never actually published anything or showed anyone his work.  People can be so ridiculous being afraid of other people's differences!  I hope I can teach my kids to not reject someone right away just based on the fact that they do things differently from them or like different things.  How egocentric is that? 

I don't know if I'm doing such a great job, though.  Conrad told a man in the library elevator last week, "You talk funny."  Ugh. 

Backtracking

I realized that I haven't been logging our activities like I originally wanted to do.  The first time I made a list, it felt like I was boasting or something, so I have been shy about doing it again, which is not helpful for making a truthful log.  So I'm going back to our calendars and recording lists of some of the things we did.

September:
1. playgroups
2. Trevor's vegetable stand (so great!)
3. Fishing and kayaking with homeschool group
4. Museum class: earthquakes
5. Nature center class (I can't recall what this one was...)
6. Homeschool conference
7. nature center class: life under water- scooped up bugs and other animals from pond, looked at them under microscopes and on overhead

October:
1. Aquarium visit
2. Visited an orchard
3. Museum class: phases of matter
4. Wisconsin trip
5. Homeschool group
6. Nature center class: bats (was Trevor in his element or what?)
7. At home we also made bat houses

November:
1. Went to a ballet (Trevor's famous comment: "You're the funnest mom ever!")
2. Trip to Michigan to see grandparents
3. Zoo (My first time seeing a red panda! Very awesome. Couldn't decide if I thought it was more bear or raccoon. The boys loved the otters and the tiger the most. They weren't so interested in the spider monkeys, which I wanted to watch forever. I guess they watch each other enough...)
4. Visits from Aunt Annie for Thanksgiving and Grandpa Peine for cousin Brooke's blessing
5. Church playgroups

December:
1. Most of the time was spent doing advent stuff (one Christ-centered/service/family activity per day leading up to Christmas)
2. Singing at nursing home
3. Nature center class: dissecting owl pellets
4. Church gym playgroups

January:
1. Physics Circus assembly - so cool! I wish Conrad would have been interested so I could have watched it with Trevor instead of wrangling him in the back. Oh well!
2. Ice Skating
3. Indoor inflatable gym visits
4. Unschooling discussion with homeschool group
5. History class at nature center and snowshoeing (Trevor)
6. Production meeting for spring play with homeschool group
7. Church gym playgroups

If it seems like I'm more interested in the field trips and hands-on experiences and getting out of the house right now, you'd be right.  I'm realizing more and more how much our boys thrive on those sorts of experiences.  Our bishop recently described Sean as a "man of action" and I realized what an apt description that was.  Sean is happiest when he's doing, and it should come as no surprise that our boys are, too.  Sean's methods of parenting naturally take him and the kids wood-chopping, bike-riding, even shopping or out to movies, but not usually sitting around doing quiet activities, though he can do that when the situation requires it.  I think he was the most accepting and enthusiastic about homeschooling when he realized how many rich "action" experiences the boys were getting. So I'm glad it makes Sean happy, too, because if both parents aren't happy with homeschooling, it can be difficult. 

We do a lot at home, but most of the time it's not very exciting to record, or I just forget to.  Like I said, I need to be better at this whole record-keeping thing.  I don't even write the regular things down, like library visits, storytimes, nature walks, or music time, which we do semi-daily.  I guess I try to focus more on the deeper learning processes, like when that random library book sparks lessons from all subject areas and makes all of us feel inspired, or when one question at breakfast keeps us busy searching for answers all day long.  Those are the most satisfying days for us.